What are DBT Self-Soothe Skills?

Practical. Simple. User-Friendly.

DBT Self-Soothe skills are made up of a list of skills that are broken down into the five senses (sight, smell, taste, touch and hearing). You always have your senses with you, no matter where you go, or what you are doing. So, you should be able to find at least one way to self-soothe in any given moment. Self-Soothing also comes in handy when other people are not readily available to help you relax. None of us can rely on others 100%. That could quickly become an overwhelming expectation for others, no matter how much they love us. We have to be able to soothe and calm ourselves in moments when others are not around, or are unable to meet our expectations of them.

So how do you do it? How do you use Self-Soothe Skills?

Find a list of Self-Soothe skills like the image above. Print it out, or read it online to identify which skills you currently use, would like to use, or have used in the past and would like to start using again. After identifying all the skills you think may help you self-soothe, try to do at least one skill every single day. If you are already having a good day, that is an even better time to try using a self-soothe skill, because you can see how much you like it with no harm and no foul. You don’t have to time yourself when you are using these skills, because it doesn’t matter if you try a new self-soothe skill for only 5 seconds, or if you decide to use a new skill for an entire weekend. The point is that you are trying new things, and getting a better idea of what “tools” you can add to your “toolbelt” if you will.

I learned about DBT Self-Soothing when I took a job doing group therapy for adolescents. These weren’t just any adolescents. These teens shared the all-too common experiences of having suicidal thoughts, self-harm behaviors, hallucinations, and thoughts of hurting others (just to name a few). We called these issues, “crisis urges,” because the feelings came like a flood all at once, and the resulting problems were often short lived, but life-threatening.

Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) was one of the primary modalities used to handle these crisis urges, and for good reason. This well-rounded and practical way of handling crises made for a solid foundation to help adolescents begin working on their coping skills. Even though I no longer work with the same organization, I have continued using DBT interventions with many of my clients, including adults. DBT Self-Soothing skills have proven to be a very user-friendly way to jumpstart many clients’ self care, and is a great way to build those comforting/peaceful feelings beyond therapy sessions.

Think of it this way: If you are trying to build a simple bird house, you may only need a few tools and materials. If you are trying to build a house your family can live in, you are going to need a lot more tools. Coping skills are the same way. Self-Soothe skills are a great way to improve your self-care routine by adding tools to your toolbelt. Happy Self-Soothing!